ANDRE ALONSO Contributing writer

Piedmont’s own Commons Cafeteria has been rated by the Zagat survey, and the results are in.

The cafeteria has a 5 star rating from the official Zagat Survey. The Café has been praised for their food, their employees and the student’s satisfaction. The buzz of a new 5 star eatery in the middle of a small town in rural Georgia has spread like wildfire.

Stars like Brad Pitt, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Lil Yachty are some of the stars on the list who want to visit.

“I plan to drop 4 stacks when I hop down there ya feel me mayn,” said Yatchy when asked about the cafeteria.

World Famous chefs want to come as guest chefs, names like Emerald, Rachel Ray and Martha Stewart. The employees regard this as a high honor and want to keep this reputation. Because of this rating the employees want to revamp the café by using velvet table clothes on all the tables, serving drinks like champagne and wine and using a new reservation aspect.

The waiting list is already two weeks long so if you want to try the new cafe out you’re going to have to call quickly to get a good table. The Café is getting a new name to fit their new rep as well, so say hello to “The Pridelands.”

The Caf had to buy the rights to use the name from Disney because they use that name in “The Lion King.” The Grand opening of the Pridelands will be Sat., April 1, and Piedmont has invited The Pope to come and cut the ceremonial ribbon for the grand opening.

This new revamp of the cafe can make Demorest, Georgia and the rest of Habersham county a tourist spot. Now the problem is if the locals want more companies coming in and crowding up the place, but that’s a different article for a different time.

April Fools!!